He replied, “Because you have so little faith. Truly I tell you, if you have faith as small as a mustard seed, you can say to this mountain, ‘Move from here to there,’ and it will move. Nothing will be impossible for you.’” – Matthew 17:20

I imagine the scars on Jesus’ hands often. I wonder about the shape of them, what stories their pattern told. I wonder what went through doubting Thomas’ mind when he beheld them for the first time after Jesus appeared to him again. 

“Put your finger here; see my hands. Reach out your hand and put it into my side. Stop doubting and believe,” Jesus tells Thomas in John 20:27.

And to be like doubting Thomas, the one He reached out His hands to--to see, behold, and believe. I wonder if He did this to anyone else, revealed Himself saying, “Look! Here I am. Believe me!” as if His record throughout the entirety of Scripture isn’t enough.

Most days I think if I don’t have enough faith, He’ll pass me up. And lately, most days I can identify with Thomas who needed to see in order to believe. I find myself there, and I have this inclination sometimes to hush the cries of my heart thinking they’ll disturb Him, because He’s a King after all.

But this King also calls Himself Father.

I remember right after my dad passed, in the most painful year of my life, mourning him. I remember one time waking up late one night to hear my dog, Belle, yelping. She had an upset stomach and was crying out for someone to let her outside. I didn’t hesitate to spring up and rush to her aid.

I remember that was a time when I was feeling like I was too sad and mourning a little too much. Could I really expect to get better this way? I began to think. 

But then I felt God using that scenario with my dog to tell me, that if I was so quick to spring up and answer her cries in the middle of the night, how much more so does He do this with me, who has infinitely more value to Him?

I think of God on the Cross, struggling for every breath, and I can’t help but think this is what all the stories in the Law and Prophets are pointing to, the Messiah, finally here to save the world. Except He did it through dying.

Sure I may be like doubting Thomas sometimes, but I think the point of the story is the One on the other side of doubt, reaching out His hands.

***

Thomas said to him, “My Lord and my God!”

Then Jesus told him, “Because you have seen me, you have believed; blessed are those who have not seen and yet have believed.”

Jesus performed many other signs in the presence of his disciples, which are not recorded in this book. But these are written that you may believe that Jesus is the Messiah, the Son of God, and that by believing you may have life in his name. 

- John 20:28-31